Time Log of a Travel Monday

Time Log of a Travel Monday

This one goes out to all the people who know that I travel a lot for work but don’t really understand what my work is or what traveling for it even means. Hope you enjoy a little peek behind the curtain of my life. If you ever see me in an airport at 5:00a… no you don’t.

Wake up to cell phone alarm and hit snooze; mentally calculate how much time you actually need before you have to leave for ORD

Get out of bed and shower; turn on the bright light to help wake you up faster even though that light makes you physically angry; consider shaving your legs but don’t

Brush your teeth and do “skin care” (moisturizer that doesn’t have any SPF in it); mentally calculate how much time you have left before you have to leave for ORD

Curse yourself for not refreshing your doubles and having to rip apart your suitcase to find where you packed your deodorant

Have not as much time left as you thought (fuck); start the “light touch” make-up that doesn’t make you look any less young

Put on clothes and pretend your old jeans pass as professional attire just because you’re in a blazer; dry hair

Request a car with a 4 minute estimated wait time

Get majorly annoyed when car is a block away and rush to pack your work bag

Spot dead flowers on the table and make conscious decision to not throw them out right now (it’s only 2 days); lock the door

Get mildly annoyed when car pickup spot is wrong

Get in car

Begin insufferable 20 minute conversation with driver who is “trying to discern your inner personality” (whatever that means) (he asks if you had to live in any book which one would you pick and you answer “The Haunting of Hill House”)

Get out of car at Terminal 3 and shut the door quickly when driver pulls up his phone to ask for your information (“because it’s hard to make friends in Chicago”)

Hand TSA agent the ID that you keep meaning to lose because your photo is a crying shame

Make it through the detector without an alarm but have your bag put back through the scanner so they can “see what’s up in there” (never find out)

Pick up an almond milk latte at Dunkin Donuts because you like to have no hands available

Begin boarding 3 minutes early (that never happens)

Inconvenience the man next to you by taking your seat (window) and quietly laugh inside your own head when the kid in front of him reclines back to sleep

Push back from the gate for an on-time departure (that really never happens)

Wonder how many people are pissed at the flight attendants for talking so loudly at 6:37a

Put this notebook away to write on your iPad for a while; remember you have to do reviews for your team later

iPad unexpectedly restarts in the middle of a sentence and you consider asking the flight attendant to throw it in her little gray trash bag

iPad comes back and you lost the whole paragraph; spare a mournful thought over having no idea what you were saying a minute ago but know that it was definitely very good

Close Scrivener to watch a bit of a movie because you have to pee and want to take your mind off of it rather than wake the sleeping giant next to you; think about how you should really start inconveniencing men more in your daily life

Land at LGA and listen to the man behind you tell the man beside him that “Shawshank is top 5 of all time” as you arrive at the gate; wonder who is worse – him or you for only ever referring to airports by their codes

Get in car to the city and ride in blissful silent peace for 36 minutes

Drop bags at the hotel first (you never do that, mostly because you never stay this close to the client site); think about how you hope you can do dinner at Sofia’s alone

Exchange texts with the project partner to meet up before going to the client; confuse him with names of nearby independent coffee shops and suggest meeting at the closest Starbucks instead

Meet at Starbucks

Go looking for a different Starbucks with outlets

Arrive at the coffee shop right next door to the client and order another almond milk latte; work in companionable silence to fill out reviews for mostly people you barely worked with in the last three months

Leave coffee shop for nearby expensive food court to fuel up for an afternoon of “candid conversations”

Pick up some kind of veggie bowl while the partner gets a wrap and move your food around to make it look like you ate it; he doesn’t say anything but you know that he knows that you know that he knows you didn’t eat it

Stop by CVS for Altoids and seltzer; confuse raspberry lime for cranberry lime and ruin your own day after checking out

Walk over to the client’s office and settle in at a big shared workspace table in the middle of their floor

Start meeting an hour early because we’re here and they’re here and what else do we have going on

Wrap up meeting

Wonder if you should go for a third almond milk latte but remember how coffee gives you panic attacks now

Work on other things from your to-do list but somehow never get to check any of it off

Say rolling goodbyes to the clients as they leave to go home

Leave their office (mostly empty by now); agree to go to some fancy sushi place down the street with the project partner because you’re technically vegetarian but sure you’ll try tuna you guess

Get suspicious upon arrival by the blacked out windows then find a normal restaurant inside; uphold suspicion throughout entire meal

Wave goodbye to the project partner and walk four blocks back to the hotel; feel like it’s half past nine at night but waking up at four will do that to you

Get back up to hotel room that’s facing construction; think about how it’s only 7:03p

Go down to hotel bar for one more drink; decide that you’ll get it to go

Sit down at the bar

Order one of the worst Sauvignon Blancs of your life and decide to drink it there; text your friends about trying tuna

Close out and go back upstairs; look up songs that are good for karaoke

Stop traumatizing the hotel with tinny iPhone Spotify playlists; brush teeth and “wash face” with a make-up wipe

Change into pajamas and get into bed

Think about how nice it is to be in bed early and how excited you are to sleep

Decide to watch a YouTube video; get out of bed to retrieve iPad from bag

Turn off iPad 12 videos later and go to sleep

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